I'm sitting here, counting my chickens before they are hatched. Really, it is more like counting what I am going to do with my renewed energy once Liam learns to sleep properly. For oh, that day is a-coming.
Last week I did a little blog on how to know if you are sleep deprived. It was during a moment of laugh before you cry madness and I was so tired from the previous night I am still amazed that I could access my blogging password in the fuzz that passes for my brain these days.
That was then. We are sleep training now. Liam will give it up and figure this out. (It being the insane night hours he keeps.) And I have a not-so-secret tactic up my sleeve: I've got a coach backing me up. The Sleep Doula is talking me through this via telephone, email and since I am so antiquated that I do not text, a chat client. Awesome! She's been telling me when we are making progress. It's been nice to have that confirmation, though I have so much more confidence after our chat the other day.
And there is progress. He's not just screaming endlessly at me. He goes in fits and spurts. Quiet, then more yelling. The yelling is less heated too. It's like he spends the quiet time trying to figure out if he ought to be yelling about this or give up and sleep. I think he will eventually give up and sleep.
It's a good thing that I don't do this as a profession though, because I would be 500 lbs in 6 months. I am tired and I would like to eat something. Lots of somethings, really.
Which brings me to my counting of chickens...when Liam sleeps, I am going to get myself nice and rested again (can it be? is it possible?) and I am going to start with some of the following:
1. Finally get back into running properly. I think that part of the reason I keep reinjuring myself when running is the lack of proper sleep. How can the body heal and rest if there is no real rest?
2. Eat properly. Yeah, see the comment about wanting to eat in the middle of the night. I do. And I probably will tonight, but when I am rested I can put the effort I want to put into eating properly.
3. With proper rest, I bet I can lose that last 15 lbs from having Liam. Then I have intentions of kicking a bit more weight to the curb. I know I can do this, but it is really hard to do it when you can't follow an exercise regime and you are just too tired to cook anymore. I read somewhere recently that sleeping even an hour or two less a night can impede weight loss efforts. I wanted to write back, "No kidding, huh. Which brainiac figured that one out?" I can barely manage (and am failing at it some weeks) to keep the laundry, dishes, and meals done, so exercise and proper eating...not so much.
4. Speaking of housework, boy do I look forward to not feeling overwhelmed by my tiny house. I want to give it a pat and tell it that it will feel better soon too.
5. Try to make business decisions and provide work quotes when you are propping your eyelids open with matchsticks. I dare you. I can't wait for that to get easier too.
6. I write and edit. The last few weeks have been brutal for sleep and worse for business. I can't wait for the fog to lift.
I have other, less lofty goals too, but for now I am just dreaming about them while talking to my 22 month old kid through the door. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...it's okay to go to sleep, little man. Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.