Porn and Other Random Happenings

Last night Ray and I sat and enjoyed porn. Yup, you read that right: porn. Actually, it's FOOD porn. Seriously...have you looked at the photos in some of those food magazines and cook books? FOOD PORN. I'm telling you. We were especially taken by Jamie Oliver's newest book. Those pictures ought to be illegal. I feel myself gaining weight just from looking at the photos. tee hee

It's Thanksgiving weekend here in Canada. A time for excess food and friends.

I have two sadnesses right now: Jennifer and Eric and their family were supposed to come to visit us, but because their passports didn't come on time, they were unable to come. I know we will see them in a few weeks (when the US passport office decides to get off their collective coffee break and process passports for a change!), but I wish they were here this weekend. And tonight we are going to say goodbye to Lisa. There is a visitation, though the funeral will be private. So we are all going to Ray's hometown tonight. I will stay with the kids and hang out with some of our friends, while Ray joins a few of our other friends and says goodbye for us. We will all miss her. It's a different kind of "missing" than with our other friends, but a missing nonetheless.

And there are big blessings too.

Today I was grocery shopping with Liam. It's a school day for Xander and it was mighty peaceful to shop with one little boy. I was in the car between grocery stores (yeah, yeah I shop in two places...go ahead and call me neurotic) and I peaked back at Liam in the mirror. He was sitting happily in his car seat, grinning and watching out the window. And I had a moment where I almost cried. Not from sadness, but gratitude. I remember how bad things were last year. He was this baby who was always crying and we were having a heck of a time with food for him and me. He couldn't tollerate milk or soy. And it felt like a huge thing. I was in the depths of post-pardum depression too. Though medicated, so I was managing (the not managing part was over the summer, so by fall I was feeling better). But a year ago I didn't believe that Liam could be happy and giggling. I didn't think we would ever get to this place. And yet, the year has flown by and Liam has grown into a little fellow who laughs and ponders the world hard. He climbs on things and runs. He's starting to stomp and jump a bit. And he is WONDERFUL. I never thought that moment would come. So I cry a little...but just with gratitude.

On our way out of the grocery store an older lady offered to take my grocery cart to the corale for me. She told me that she could see I "had my hands full" and I laughed a little and said, "Not as much today. My older one is in school." And she smiled and said that she remembered how it was with little ones. I thanked her, and wished her a Happy Thanksgiving! But the best part was that I was right: they are not so full today. Not because of Xander being in school, but because time has worked a bit of magic: I have two healthy boys. And a lot to be thankful for.

Happy Thanksgiving!